No Safeword – Honey Kinkade

As you know by now, I’ve hired on Honey to write my descriptions, if you’ve paid mind to the end of them where she signs off. Well this union started with us linking up via social media. In short order a shoot date was set many months back. She made it clear she wanted as immobile as possible, so crank the straps I did.

Ive only ever done a table hair tie one time prior, with Paige Turner but she suggested it so – well I can’t resist amping it up if I’m given a green light.

– Derek

“You’ll have fun writing this,” he says. HA. Yeah thanks Derek. This is gonna be a long one. *insert squirm-face emoji here*

Y’all. I know I asked for it but holy forking SHIRTballs, this was intense. (And I loved it. But you didn’t hear that from me, shush.) Thirty minutes, be as mean as if it was only five, and pack gag me, which I’ve never experienced. WOOF.

I don’t think you understand. All my life I’ve believed that my feet are not as ticklish as the rest of me. Which holds true most of the time, but if you completely take away my ability to move like Derek was able to do, it’s as if the rest of my spots suddenly gave up their sensitivity and sent it to my soles. Seriously. Yeezus.

Derek is as mean in this clip as he promised to be, and my ticklish toes suffer for it. He quickly found the worst (best) spot, which I’ll tell you all cause there’s no point hiding it anymore; the base of my pinky toe where it meets the ball of my feet is sheer oblivion. I cease to exist when he persecutes that spot, snurf upon snurf upon snurf snurfity snurf. Buenas noches, good flacking night.

My favorite moment though is a spot he found that makes me sing (19:27). No really, it was hilarious and Derek and I both got a kick out of it. I can’t explain it better than that, you’re just gonna have to watch it to find out.

What a send off, friends. Derek is extraordinary and I’m looking forward to my next visit!